• Loneliness and depression. You're meant to be together, but you're so far apart. Everyday things just aren't fun anymore without your special someone at your side.
   
• Jealousy and suspicion. During the time you spend away from each other, do you worry that you might not be the only one in his or her life? Is the love of your life really everything he or she claims to be? Although some jealousy is natural, without an easy way to reassure yourself that all is indeed well, the feeling can eat you alive.
   
• Time and expenses. One or both of you will have to travel every time you meet. Can you afford to pay your share of the travel expenses without turning your financial life into a shambles? Can you afford to take time from work and other obligations without repercussions?
   
• Values and expectations. It's easy to assume that you are both seeking the same thing in a relationship, and share similar values. Yet differences in culture -- even a difference in background or education -- can lead to confusion and conflict, even when you think you have much in common.

The day of decision. You've decided you want to spend the rest of your lives together. One or both of you will then have to pull up stakes and leave behind homes, jobs, friends, even family. It's a huge step to take, much bigger than the two of you moving into an apartment across town.

It may be easier to live in the moment, and avoid thinking about the unique problems that come with long-distance relationships. People can and do maintain this convenient blindness, often for years or decades. Neither one is prepared to take the next step, and the relationship stumbles along, convenient, stagnant and ultimately unsatisfying.

But is this really what you want out of life? Strong, lasting, mature relationships need open communication. Sharing a romantic night out is one thing; sharing your feelings and fears is something quite different. It's risky and scary, but it's difficult to keep your relationship emotionally healthy if you're sharing only the happy thoughts.

For most people, a loving relationship is only complete when the two of you can spend your lives together. Take the time you need to get to know each other from a distance. But be prepared to set a goal of real togetherness once you've decided you're truly right for each other, or end the relationship graciously if not.

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