Internet Dating and Online Personals: An Introduction

Online dating is a way for singles to meet each other on Internet web sites. An online dating site typically gathers information about its members, and uses that information to search for potential partners with compatible interests and characteristics. Online dating sites differ in the extent to which they help members screen contacts from other members.

What’s the difference between online dating and computer dating?
Traditional computer dating services use questionnaires filled in by hand from customers, and input that data into a computer program that attempts to match the customer with compatible people. These services suffer from a limited market area and a lack of privacy. Fees can be high, and results are often disappointing.

Online dating services automate the questionnaire process and allow their customers to interact with each other directly. You can search for other members at any time of the day or night, from the privacy of your home, rather than waiting for regular business hours. You can search for compatible people in your own area, or in any other part of the country, or the world. There is often no fee for basic services, and subscriptions are usually very reasonably priced.

What’s the difference between online dating and the personals column of the local newspaper?
If you post a personal ad in your local newspaper, only the people who read the classifieds will see it. You may be flooded with responses, or you may not receive a single reply. Responses are completely unscreened -- you will have to filter out the creeps, the timewasters, and the otherwise ineligible, and you may not end up with anyone you would want to meet.

Online dating services use the information provided by their members to suggest compatible matches, and they make it very easy to search for people using a variety of criteria.

What’s the difference between online dating and the local singles’ scene?
The local singles' scene, whether it's a trendy bar or nightclub or a church singles' group, is only for the very brave and socially adept. The bar scene is particularly risky for those who are shy or uncomfortable approaching strangers. And even if you do meet someone in a bar, you may end up with someone who only likes going to singles bars -- not always the best potential romantic partner in the long run. Church and other social groups for singles attract like-minded people, but the membership may not be diverse enough for you to find and develop stimulating relationships. And both aspects of the singles scene require time commitments, and may not fit in well with your schedule.

Online dating services offer the best of both worlds -- the "anything goes" atmosphere of the singles scene, where people from diverse backgrounds can come together in a non-threatening way, and special affinity groups, which narrow the field to those who share a particular interest. Both types of sites can expose you to a larger variety of people than you are likely to meet through local face-to-face venues, and you are free to explore the sites at any time, rather than on someone else's schedule.

Who uses online dating?

People whose life or work schedule makes it difficult to conform to someone else's timetable. Anytime is a good time to meet and communicate with people online.

People who are not comfortable with the "singles bar" scene. If your goal is to meet someone who likes going out to bars, fine, but that limits your potential contacts. Online dating provides much more variety in terms of age, interests and personal style than you're likely to find in a singles bar or singles group.

Nice people who aren't comfortable introducing themselves to strangers. Online dating gives you time to get to know someone in email or chat before taking the relationship to the next level.

People who value their privacy. Online dating sites allow you to conceal your identity until you are comfortable revealing it. Nobody needs to know you're looking for a partner -- not your friends, your co-workers (or boss!), or your family.

Now, go give it a try and write us back and let us know if this article helpful.