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Is he married? Straight talk to women
about "game players'.
It is believed around the online dating circuit that a full one-third
of the men on most of the national dating sites are married. Another
one-third are in a bad relationship and they're out "hunting". Some
dating sites like Lavalife cater to the Married but Looking crowd,
others like
MyCountryMatch.com ask people to pledge honesty about their
marriage status and don't accept married members. So, how do you
find out if he's married without hiring a private investigator?
We hope this article helps:
Picture this scenario: You’re a woman on her own, with or without
a relationship or two in your past. While the single life can be
carefree and exciting, you also look forward to the companionship
of a man who can be your best friend, your romantic partner, and,
possibly, your future husband.
There’s just one catch. The last thing you want is to get involved
with a married man, and not all men are forthcoming about their
status. How do you find out if he’s already “taken”?
The one answer we heard from everyone we asked was "Be direct".
Before you go to the trouble of typing his name into a search engine
such as Google.com or Yahoo.com, or even paying for an online background
check, ask up front if he’s married or currently in a relationship.
Remind him "married" means not legally divorced - some guys think
separated is divorced, go figure!
We also learned from dating experts that married men often give
clues about their real lives, whether they mean to or not. Here
are some tips on what to look for:
- Where do you typically go for dates? Does he avoid places
near where he lives or works? Have you been to his home? Met
his family? Is he nervous about being seen with you in public?
- Does he give you a cell phone number or a work number, but
never a home phone number? Does he tell you only to call him
at work because he’s never home?
- Does he call off dates with frequent tales of bad luck?
A car that breaks down, a forgotten appointment, a sudden change
in work schedule? Bad luck happens to everyone now and then,
but people with something to hide seem to have more than their
fair share of it.
- Not all married men wear a wedding band, and not all rings
are wedding rings, but if you see a tan line or a groove where
he would ordinarily be wearing a ring, that may be cause for
suspicion.
- Ask him what he likes to eat. Single men either cook for
themselves, or they go out to eat. If he looks well nourished
but is vague about his dining-in preferences, someone, probably
his wife, is feeding him.
- Does he use the words “we” or “I” when he talks about vacations,
adventures, or day to day activities? If he unconsciously refers
to himself in the plural, there may well be a wife and family
involved.
- Does he keep an odd schedule? If he works regular daytime
hours but can never seem to meet you for dinner during the week,
or if he’s oddly strict about when you can call, he may be trying
to coordinate his home life and his extracurricular activities.
What's his attitude about relationships? Does he admit to, or
mention previous infidelities? Does he think monogamy is boring,
stifling, or impossible to achieve?
Romance and excitement are wonderful, but the best relationships
are based on trust, friendship and fidelity. Use your best judgment
in deciding whether to continue a relationship with a man you know
(or suspect) is married, but give some thought to how you would
feel about the “other woman” if you were his wife.
If this article was helpful, please
write us and
let us know!
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